Mania Madness

Rapid-Cycling Bi polars have the ability to go from one extreme to the next or both at the same time. Mania for me is wonderful, It is my favorite mood state the reason being my energy is high



I can do so many things very goal oriented during this phase,I become very happy and social, I look great and dress wonderful my alter ego appears Suzanne!!she is quite wild she love to work shop,gamble,increased sex drive,spends money,travels,and at times drinks and party!! its a great time while it lasts but it doesn't last long anymore,when I was younger.this was my life.and I could maintain but when the rapid-cycling diagnosis came.it hit me like a ton of brinks...to be discussed in another blog



Mania now occurs less frequently within the last year which saddens me but makes my doctor happy.as the goal is to shorten the cycles and severity of symptoms.

when I have a mania cycle now in only last at most 72hours where i do not sleep,work on the computer,if I am very hyper I clean my apartment scrubbing everything and throwing things out

even things that I could still use,I just like getting rid of stuff when I'm like this,or I keep myself very busy with bingo, walks, shopping and my dogs or my grand kids they usually tire me right
out then it takes me few days to recuperate from that my mania is nothing compared to 9 grand kids all under 10 and two dachshunds Lucy and Luke

The World Health Organization an overview

It strikes me as funny sometimes, sad and then downright makes me angry,but I can't let emotions get the best of me when a subject matter such as Mental Illness and Addiction is so prevalent in our homes and communities thought our Nations.The more research I do on the subject the more revelations I have,unless you have actually gone through the experience which I have done.many others have as well it has not been my condition in which people including myself are what is preconceived by the general public or mental health professionals but rather individuals that have a illness in which they are faced with discrimination and stigma for something that is not of there choosing.

The role of STIGMA a private responsibility,and is further reinforced by stigma.
seriously Mental ill are perceived as unattractive and frightening group of people who cannot lobby for themselves and have no one to for them because of the association.
In the absence of a unified voice the easiest response for governments is to do nothing.
participating by a user in the mental health programming and policy development is negligent
Mental health users are a extremely invisible and marginalized lot.

Barriers in developing Mental health services can be overcome if there was greater political will to achieve this advocacy,for people with mental illness, better collaboration to improve the chances.

The fact that the field of mental health is fragmented into many types distracts policy makers from the whole mental health issue,
Behavioral violence, substance abuse,suicide
Severe Psychosis
unrecognized depression/anxiety

Mental Health/Disorders
has a two way relationship with poverty
20% of children drop out of school
74% are incarcerated
it is a leading consequence of violence against women
crisis war/ natural disasters

The perceptions are mine

When a challenge arises, a crisis, a more than sad occasion like death it seems I am addicted to the drama I'll call life my life however with age I have learned to mellow and even combat the wild beast of Mania however I still am called apon when the crisis arise and with my experience
and fortitude am willing to help..I did not receive much of this in my life so I do my best to give where possible..but we all have the choice to do or die and it is a personal one what ever experience I try to command in anothers life its not there choice. It does sadden me as these are preventable and education are key to know ones benefits but yet again I am to the realization that all don't get that choice or chance

So why I ask have I been given the choice to be a voice for the addicted and mental health
as I am recovering from both.?

Not by will or by strength, but by might the fight to get well fight harder than the illness had taken me..

I am a very direct and to the point individual I come across some would say as harsh and tough
but when I am speaking to others the truth is harsh and tough and many don't want to hear and are not ready for the truth...

some have no awareness of the mental illness or addiction and that it a disease, an illness,
the right hemisphere of the brain does not allow 74% to see the symptoms,while to the observer
it is clear one is ill..so getting treatment is difficult when one cannot admit the are ill and the severity as mental health diagnosis are not favorable illness and difficult for even the patient to grasp initially however treatment is available and the doctors are there to prescribe
overall treatment options and recovery well that's usually not the case for many...

Mental health and Addiction are a widely talked about issue but what is being done to ensure the patients treatment options,quality of living,resources,support,family,work and diagnosis and recovery are substainable for the addict or mental health sufferer...

Wellness Challenge

I was having an occupational therapist come to my home,I had tried other forms of therapy.nothing really worked and I needed something to help me connect the dot as I would describe it.I would have trouble with basics like forgetting my belonging when I leave the house locking myself out.needing to do an errand but forgetting the objects or papers I needed in which to do the errand.wanting to make my goals but unable to do them..there was a disconnect which I had never experienced before as I am usually with it and articulate multitasker but during this phase I was unable to even pull it together..and when I could I would get lost on the bus even though I have been there many times before.or forget why I was there.
.
the frustration was mounted by the agitation of being around people which would lead me not able to keep me appointments..or meet my obligations..heighten by the worry of what was happening to me and the horrific side-effects of the medications I really didn't recognize myself anymore.I began to isolate I couldn't handle the situation,my diagnosis.your the reality that this was it I was crazy..cause even to me I was..
I certainly was not the person I once was.
nor will I ever be.they gave my an occupational therapist Julie..I was grateful one on one which was great.she came to my home so I always kept my appointments.she gave me valuable ways to cope,understand,about triggers, symptoms,and how I can respond well this was all new and I was willing to learn as what I was doing was not working
Wellness was soon apon me which I could never see before.now it is possible as I am working and feeling and being better
Wellness however does take work and a lot of work...but I will do the work as wellness is the challenge.

an elephant's ear

The pounding in my head still has not stopped,the silence surrounds me just the computer humming and the odd car driving over the rain splash!,my stomach is in knots urning and turning its 4am my hair tousled above my head playing with each strand in a way to elevate the strain on my brain...I massage my scalp as to desensitize my brain from the Midnight Madness
my genius mind this manic depressive is at again thinking writing over and over again...
usually the pleasure is there today is different,I did set a goal to limit my time at this creative genius hat I wear...
I did do the pile of dishes that were there for weeks finally...some action
I am please with that progress and I had to ask for help with that task...but its done I don't have dishes asking when will I get done...
so I will use only a few dishes oh look there are 2 glasses and two bowls now....so it begins again my dish dilemma...when will it ever end...

Let the madness begin

Well I've been well under way into days of hypo mania, many weeks now the ability to create is simply amazing..in the last 3 days I have managed with 5 hours sleep this is always good with me as I prefer to get things done,but in practical matters what I've accomplished is matters within my mind yes they are creative and put to so called use but where is the benefit to who's benefit well that we shall see.
Midnight for me there is much to do I must busy myself off to the Metro formerly called
Dominion, suited me fine why the name change,leave things as they are, I don't like stupid things as such....I love to shop at 24 hrs places no one is there and since I haven't done a speck of shopping in over a month I figured it was time! so off I went the rain had settled and despite the weather has been warmer I haven't left the house in days ...I still couldn't bring myself to do a full shopping as I am cutting back,wanting to loose weight, I dropped off my bag of fat cloths to the good Will before I got to the grocery store now I have to buy new clothes I always throw away my clothes in hopes to buy more and never get to the store....so my closet are bear and I am losing weight...