midnightmatters

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Toronto, Ontario, Canada
This Blog is not for the faint of heart,my direct approach is to address the importance of lifestyle choices.. education and awareness.the story will unfold Midnight matters ..days just slip away..and nights get longer writing has been a passion of mine now I share it with my audience. sharing my stength.hope,faith Everything in between Thanks for visiting come back soon!

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Thursday, September 3, 2009

Six inch stiletto shoes


Today my day started out at 11:00am blurry-eyed.went on the balcony at my daughter apartment to have a smoke. her very pregnant girlfriend came by,we got to talking.oh no not that again and it starts she has bipolar there we are three of us talking about bipolar.my favorite topic..and drinkers in non-functioning relations..well something functions on these guys as both her and my daughter are pregnant.however there not drinking now cause there prego and certainly both living sober for today..with withdrawal symptoms.why can everyone else drink.they are both seeing this more clearly as bipolar alone can destroy ones perceptions add alcohol well instant time bomb waiting to happen.so there mates right now are in the dog house cause they are inconsiderate drunks with no life.match made in heaven right.except when one is sober there expecting a baby so there expectations have changes like as though the man has he is still the same guy just you are not intozicated.
What an opportunity for us to talk about alcoholism we share and I read from the big book of A.A my daughter really didn't want to hear that maybe just maybe there is a chance she is one.her friend however was open to the chance as her father was an alcoholic.my daughter never really thought I was an alcoholic,and that I am just getting old and don't want to have fun anymore
We left for a long walk sunny day with the dogs,did some grocery shopping remember I am a sabbatical fom domestic duties,but I am a wife and a mom they needed to see I love them..came home cooked a nice healthy dinner salad. chicken and sweet potaow,rice aaahh finally some quite while the family ate there dinner,very appreciative of my efforts to say the least.
While I was cooking we got to talking about life..yes of course my life and how it affected them. my daughter views are quite different to my sons and they are both entitled to there opinion and communicate them exceptionally well.remember they are my children my daughter is 26,and my son is 30 for years we have the debate over my life.as you know I raise my children on my own,by choice yes I even picked there fathers,so I know who they are, by the time I was nineteen sure I had relationships but they where far from perfect or long lasting however the children of my unions are still around and have survived.3 of them.






Some scars are deeper than others..and a few resentments towards me.
Six inch stilettos open toe are my preferance,I have utilized my skills experience and knowledge to benefit myself and my family and yes even the stiletto shoes can get a girl whatever she wants and in more ways than one.Shocking as it may be I was a call girl.hooker, prostitute,self-employed business women. I upgrade to massage therapist as the kids got olders more respectable job title for others getting back to what the kids and I where talking about,my daughter doesn't like the facts of the matter.I explained to her that her perception of what my job title entails is purely illusional. how is a women with six inch stillos shoe make her money well,first things first what someone calls me from the many advertisments I pay to do,men call..for all kinds of services,I am exclusivly massage fetishes and domination.I don't suck on anything.I am not a sucker
I am a fucker though bend over.
I am open to listening to my daughters rather harsh judements of me.and I can calmly discuss things both personal and professional,I never have been a supporter of free fuckin as most women are.some women are victimized by men.some play victim.
they spread there legs then blame the men if it doesn't work out call the men deadbeat fathers,live on social service. government housing.rather than take responsibilty for bad choices they made.I can tell you coming from where I am the only victim here is the ones that get screwd I just do the screwing.
in a mans world. I play by the rules of the game called life my life so screw off or bend over
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The reason of all reasons

A blog dedicated to strength,courage and hope.
Mental Illness and addictions is a disease,it should be treated as such recovery is possible.
My goal is to carry the message to those that still suffer that you will not have to be in isolation. be free my friend at last.
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