midnightmatters

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Toronto, Ontario, Canada
This Blog is not for the faint of heart,my direct approach is to address the importance of lifestyle choices.. education and awareness.the story will unfold Midnight matters ..days just slip away..and nights get longer writing has been a passion of mine now I share it with my audience. sharing my stength.hope,faith Everything in between Thanks for visiting come back soon!

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Wednesday, July 8, 2009

The Switch------It's in the brain


The switch that occurs in my brain..I can feel it occurring I am in tune with my body
as a rapid-cycling Bipolar.Today the switch is on,how do I know this first off the sensation in my brain.a light goes on,lightheaded,thoughts are rolling in and out
what is this switch and why does it occur? Bipolar this is why I have it,there is no denial here my friends..It is very real.The switch to mixed mood,where low and high
is experienced at the same time.also known as hypomania clinical terms..how do I feel
well right now I am changing gears,my body craves carbs and sweets,I want to be alone
yet I cannot seem to sleep..there are the thoughts that continue,I call it my creative force.that compels me to write this experience.when does it happen after my monthly usually.so today is the day.I feel it it is real no one has to explain it to me.nor do I have to run to the doctor as to whats going on.I know and am aware of it.
I do not take medications to see the phases through I experience them as they come.
there is no danger present like some freak at a show,the dullness and excitement as I remain unusually calm..I feel peaceful and calm,the knowledge of knowing and feeling the experience is somewhat beneficial right now..the slight nausea in my stomach,the light headed feeling,the wanting to sleep but can't,the need for speed,
as I precede ever so slowly,hypo mania is the state right now..the plan for today
go with it,breathe,meditate,write, you see as a rapid-cycler the moods don't last long each phase changes very quickly,at this moment,I can be in it not fight it
irritable somewhat but not raging an improvement slightly,keeping a mood journal
is helpful when I can track the moods,then I see the pattern and progress the duration of each mood and what the triggers are,what is the treatment rest..
I can get overstimulated with news,media,computer and TV,life in general..
adding activity today will change the mood..I know what worked for me today.despite the grips of this illness sometimes..moods matter to rapid-cyclers
writing this for insight for both of us

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The reason of all reasons

A blog dedicated to strength,courage and hope.
Mental Illness and addictions is a disease,it should be treated as such recovery is possible.
My goal is to carry the message to those that still suffer that you will not have to be in isolation. be free my friend at last.
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